Roller Skating, Handcuffs and Shriners – The Montana/Wyoming Leg

We left Ruidoso, NM for Bozeman, Montana. On the way we got to see a lot of pretty mountain scenery as well as tons and tons of wild antelope. I’m a dork and I got a little choked up being a native Kansan and thinking of our state song. We stayed overnight at our halfway point of Fort Collins, Colorado where we play a split week later in the tour. It looks like a cute town and our hotel was decent. I enjoyed a long soak in the hot tub while most everyone else went out. I wanted some alone time with my sore muscles. Andrew and I went to the IHOP next door for dinner and had the funniest waiter. The ticket said his name was Daniel P. but his nametag said Danimal and he was a cross between Keanu Reeves and Shaggy from Scooby Doo. My omelet came with pancakes and they were the same size as the plate so I asked if I could get a bigger plate so the syrup didn’t spill everywhere and before I could finish he says “Totally! I need room for my pancakes too!”. Imagine Keanu saying this. This kid cracked us up every time he came by.

The next morning we left really early for Bozeman. I was excited to pass a herd of buffalo and wish I had a better camera to capture them with!!! It was cool! We arrived in Bozeman and me, Erin, Andrew, Jeff and Dave went to this dive bar called the Cat’s Paw where we proceeded to get knackered on $2 shots of Goldschlager and $4.50 pitchers of some local microbrew. We shot some pool then meandered back to our hotel. It was freezing and started to snow!!! Luckily we had bought some emergency winter gear at Wal Mart for cheap. Mine is pink, of course!

The show in Bozeman was interesting to say the least. We were all a bit unfocused and tired and it was in an arena which took some getting used to. The sound reverberation made it hard to hear. The crowd was nice and seemed to enjoy it but it was just a very odd night. We were glad to leave the next morning for Casper, WY where we would have a one-off and then a Golden Day (no travel or show) as these are rare!

We had our one-off in yet another arena setting but it went better this time. TMG went up to the concourse for something to eat and they had a Bud Light station for those over 21 who wanted to drink to get a wristband. Really!? A Broadway tour and we’re doing alcohol wristbands? I joked that we were going to have a mosh pit too. This audience was REALLY laughing so I don’t know if they were just crazy starved for entertainment there or it was the beer!

After the show we went back to our hotel which looked like a cross between the hotel from “The Shining” and the ads for Mount Airy lodge in the Poconos. Chris (Bill Sykes) was inspired to do a photo shoot with a bunch of us in goth-like garb and crazy hair and makeup as he is a budding photographer and this place had some great locations! It was sort of a brothel feel and I was to be the madame. Yes, this is what we do when on tour and bored silly.

Now we were super stoked for Saturday night of our Golden Day! Matt and I planned an outing for everyone and we got the hotel shuttle to take us to the Wagon Wheel Roller Rink for “Matt and Stacie’s Big 80’s All-Skate” skating party. We had all gone to the mall and thrift stores that afternoon for costume pieces and we dressed all 80’s to go to this rink. Everyone looked great and we had everything from early 1980’s to late and every style in between. I was rocking a side ponytail and a Frankie Goes to Hollywood t-shirt that Andrew helped me make to Erin who was inspired by Jem to Jeff who took a whole new take on it and dressed as a cop from “Chips”. There were about 25 of us in all and the regulars (which we way outnumbered) didn’t know what to think of us. I rolled by one group of people and heard one lady say “They’re with that Oliver! Theatre show”. The management knew we were coming and I guarantee they were grateful for the business. They played lots of 80’s music for us and took our pic out on the rink and had us all sign a sheet so they could put it up in the rink’s lobby. Really? We were the biggest thing to happen to this place in THAT long? It was hilarious! We had bad cheap snacks and fell down. Matt took right to it but I had A LOT of trouble getting back in the swing of things. I could go around a couple times then my shins and ankles would hurt so I’d roll myself into a wall and take a break. Sweet Colin (Dodger) had a hard time so Chris took his hand and guided him around helping him keep balance and back to his feet when he fell. It was really sweet.

Once back to the hotel we proceeded to close down the bar and Jeff handcuffed Erin and I together. On the way back to our rooms we heard a bad rendition of “It’s Raining Men” clearly being sung by two white women and it was coming from the ballroom. Jeff, Erin, Andrew, Dave, and I danced in the doorway with Andrew doing full out dance routines. The band was having a great time watching us and this caused the two remaining tables at a shriner’s banquet to look and see what they were so entertained by. Dave went in and we could see him chatting with some folks then he motioned for us to come in. We sort of sheepishly went in and were told it was last call and to grab a drink from the bar. We hit the dance floor and some of the remaining revelers came and joined us. Erin and Andrew were quite the dance team. I got the feeling we were the best thing to happen to this shindig all night. They even played “Tequila” and we did the Pee Wee Herman Big Shoe Dance and here are these old ladies in their gowns doing it right along with us. The grand poohbah or whatever he was called gave Erin and I roses. I grabbed my camera and Erin and I posed with this amazing Santa Claus looking dude in his tux pants and huge green John Deere suspenders. I grabbed Poohbah’s little plaid hat and we took this great shot.

After this amazing time in Casper we were so rejuvenated and ready for another great time heading back to Great Falls, Montana. Well, Great Falls was cursed. It was snowing for like the fourth day in a row as we hopped the bus for a long ride back to do this last one-off on this particular leg of the tour. About 3 hours in we smelled this awful burning smell like an electrical fire but the highway was under construction and there was only one lane in each direction with nowhere to stop and see what was wrong. We finally went under and overpass and turned into this pull-off right in front of a Grizzly Bear Encounter park/zoo thing and proceeded to break down. Here we sat for the next several HOURS waiting for a new bus to come pick us up. Finally up drives this rickety-ass old city bus that

was a stick-shift and we drove through the now icy streets, sliding around and fearing our deaths would come in the middle of Montana. We finally arrived at our hotel in the wee hours of the morning where god bless our crew, they were waiting to help us with our baggage as the hotel elevator was out of order on top of everything else. We headed straight to the bar and proceeded to drink our crappy night away. The next day I spent a quiet day alone doing laundry and exploring the area. It was a quaint little town with a few cute shops but many were closed as it was Columbus Day. The show went pretty well although my dresser was less than stellar and the girls were in a make-shift dressing room with mirrors propped up against the wall. Yes, yet another janked-up location on the Meth and Bail Bonds Tour. Alaggio’s mom and sisters drove out from Idaho to see the show and we actually did have a good show.

We had voted to hop the bus after the show and travel for a couple of hours to get us started on our long, long trip to Owensboro, KY. But that is another LONG story so I’ll save that for my next blog!